Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Vaccine Friendly Docs in Your Area

Did you know you could go to Dr Sear's website and there is a link to information about vaccines- schedules that may be more baby friendly and also a link to a page of pediatricians who will respect alternative schedules? Click Vaccine_Friendly_Doctors to find a care provider in your area!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Conscious Breathing

Holistic NYC Doula has a wonderful blog! We teach breath awareness in our childbirth classes. I think this video clip is a good one for understanding how breath enters into a relaxed preparation for birth.

conscious breathing-quick-easy-intro-to-yogic-breathing

Please consider that the he hes and he hahs of yesteryear breathing techniques work for some since it is the repetitive nature of the breathing or the "doing something" that kept your mind occupied. But this type of breathing is actually effective in calming down in most any situation.

We always think it is funny that partners stand over a woman and yell "breathe" to her. She is breathing! But he or she is trying to remind the mom to be aware of her breath. Staying on top of your breath- keeping your breath awareness so that you can keep air moving up and down- to your baby- to your body- to keep your muscles and organs full of power, is essential to staying calm and staying energized in labor.

Take time to watch this video. It may help you understand conscious breathing so that you can use this tool in your labor- and in your life!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Empty Cup

 "One of my favorite stories concerns a Buddhist scholar and a Zen Master. The scholar had an extensive background in Buddhist Studies and was an expert on the Nirvana Sutra. He came to study with the master and after making the customary bows, asked her to teach him Zen. Then, he began to talk about his extensive doctrinal background and rambled on and on about the many sutras he had studied.


The master listened patiently and then began to make tea. When it was ready, she poured the tea into the scholar's cup until it began to overflow and run all over the floor. The scholar saw what was happening and shouted, "Stop, stop! The cup is full; you can't get anymore in."

The master stopped pouring and said: "You are like this cup; you are full of ideas about Buddha's Way. You come and ask for teaching, but your cup is full; I can't put anything in. Before I can teach you, you'll have to empty your cup."

This story is and old one, but it continues to be played out in our lives day-by-day. We are so enamored of our own ideas and opinions and so trapped by our conditioning that we fill ourselves up to the brim and nothing can get in." http://www.prairiewindzen.org/emptying_your_cup.html

When I did my first training with Pam England, she tells this story. She relates it to us as childbirth educators and even doulas. We must not come to teach a class or go to a birth with our own agendas. There can not be one way to birth- or to think about something and it only be my way.

Yesterday I was present for a wonderful birth. It was a client who had used me for her previous two births. The first birth ended in a cesarean after her labor stalled for hours after entering the hospital in an active pattern and being 5 to 6cm dilated. The baby did not tolerate labor well and pitocin was added to the mix and when it came time to push the baby did not tolerate that at all. Her second labor was induced 9 days early and she had even had a doctor who did an external version for a breech presentation a few weeks earlier. She was induced with the hope that this baby would be a bit smaller and since she was very favorable for the induction, it meant only breaking her water and giving her a very little bit of pitocin. Eight hours later, unmedicated for any pain- she gave birth to a second baby.

She had been walking around 3 centimeters for a week or more and the decision was made to induce this third baby a day before her due date. Again, breaking the water and then a few hours later she had a very small amount- 2 miliunits- for only an hour and a half- and after less than 3 hours after it was started and four and a half hours after her water was broken, she gave birth to her third baby- unmedicated for any pain relief.

These are happy births. She does wonderfully handling the contractions. She complains only about the shaking that accompanies her transitions. She is a fabulous warrior in labor and birth!

I do not like inductions. I love for moms to go into labor on their own time clock. I do not like to have them interfered with at all. But .... the difference is this mom lived 3 hours from me. She had tried to find a doula in her area, but was unsuccessful in doing so. She had asked me to please doula for her again. Before she had only lived an hour away.

As much as I repeat the words, "this is not my birth!," I have to say I was a bit relieved when she told me she was being induced. I knew that the odds of me making it for the birth were much greater in her doing so. But, I have to share this- I never once told her that. I never once said, "don't be induced" or "do be induced." It was not my birth.

I figured if she went into labor and labored quickly and I missed it, as sad as I would be, I was not meant to be there. I also was concerned if I led her to be induced and something did not go well, I would feel responsible. It had to be her decision. I must have told her every time we chatted over the weeks leading up to her induction, "I fully support any decisions you make." Sure I would help her think about the pluses and minuses of each situation and what the ramifications could be... but I tried my best to have an empty cup.

I think as a doula this is easier to do than when I am teaching a class. I think when I have students, they are wanting my opinion often times due to my experience in the field. But I still try to temper my comments with, "This is my personal opinion." and let them know what is evidence based and what is anecdotal information.

I find I have to remind myself often that I must enter the realm of someones journey with an empty cup. It is their path, not mine to walk. It is their history, knowledge, intuition, experiences, baggage or whatever that guides them as well as information I may implore.

This mom made a decision and I supported her fully. And it worked out beautifully. I was there a little more than 4 hours prior to the birth. The induction went as beautiful as it could have gone. She was delighted with her birth and my support.

Just remind yourself if you are a doula or birth professional, an empty cup is so needed when you are a birth guide. If you are a student, don't come with so many preconceived ideas that you are not open to any new ones that may indeed be exactly what you need.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Cudos for Our Company from a New Dad!

Teresa, I can't say anything but great things about your organization. You and your doulas/instructors are more than just vendors of a service but become integral parts of their clients lives as it relates to their birth experiences and beyond. When my wife needed reassurance about breastfeeding you and Pam were there even at late hours. When my wife's labor and delivery was so quick Guina was there long after to help my wife through the pain of being separated from her baby and husband while the baby and I went to nicu and my wife got some stitches. Guina was there long after the time I was expecting her to go, helping with some lactation coaching and then when she did leave, she gave both me and my wife a kiss on the forehead. Then she came back the next day for a little bit to make sure we were ok. If this is some tricky marketing ploy, to get us to tout your company's services then you've got me hook, line and sinker. Although, I vehomently believe that you have surrounded yourself with truly compassionate people. People who are delighted to share in the lives of others and the payment that they receive is a fraction of the reward that they experience in doing what they are doing.


Thank you again for all the help that has been afforded to my wife, Jenna, and our new baby Camille.
 
Austin Mascarenas
6.11.2010

Recomendation from a past client x3

Resa, a mom who I have had the pleasure of being with at all three of her births, recently sent this comment to me after I encouraged her by telling her I loved her mothering style. She allows her children to be creative and self expressive. She is a homeschooling stay at home mom of three and quite the Wonder Woman!.

She shared this with me and told me I could share it with you!

"You're a woman and mom I aspire to be like. Ron and I often think back to some of the things we learned from you in our childbirth class and realize it has applications to our decisions as parents. Meeting you created a ripple in the life of the R5 much further than just their three splendid births. And this is a ripple I couldn't imagine being where I am today without."

I appreciate knowing that things I teach have a ripple effect! Thanks Resa!

Monday, June 7, 2010

The TATA Fairies

Many of you know that I am a breast cancer survivor. I have been breast cancer free- and without breasts per se for 2.5 years now! I had immediate reconstruction after a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy due to being a carrier of the BRCA gene- but the pathology found cancer that had been undetected in mammograms and even a breast MRI. So this year is the 3rd year I will walk in the 3Day 60 mile Susan G Komen walk for breast cancer.

Labor of Love sponsors a team- the Labor of Love Tata Fairies. Other doulas in our group have walked in the past- Pam Roe on our team and Alicia Pillsbury on the Tutus for Tatas team. This year I will be accompanied by three young moms. Lindsay Tucker, Lisa Strickland and Rebecca Mariollis. They have all been our students and doula clients.

I admire their desire to be a part of this journey with me. It is strenuous training and a rigorous 3 days of walking. It also entails not only a registration fee of $80 or more, but then each walker must raise $2300. It is not a team total- but each individual must raise this amount in order to walk. If you do not raise it- you either do not walk or you give them your credit card for the balance and they will accept payments to erase the credit card for a month or so following the walk. Ouch! This may be the hardest part for these moms.

I have already raised my money for this year... I have some wonderful generous friends, family and clients who helped me be able to do so. We will be holding some fund raising events over this summer and early fall. But I wondered if you had a heart for helping and the ability to do so- if you would consider going to our team page and choosing a young mother in my group to donate to- it would really be incredible. Even a little donation goes a long way. And if you like, you can click on their page- make a donation online- it is secure- and even choose to make a larger donation over a 3 month period of time. Sometimes little bits are less painful and you don't even notice that $20 or whatever amount being gone!

You can also print out a form and mail it in... just choose one of my team members and go for it! Also, if you think you would love to join our team- please let me know! We would love to have a larger team! Click on the link below to help!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Wondering if things are actually "normal"

You know I think outside the box... I am creative and have ideas that are constantly swirling around in my head. This is one reason I love blogging- typing in those swirling ideas... and this week this has been swirling...

We hear when a mom in labor "stalls" at 6cm for hours that her labor is "stalled." That something must be wrong. That someone needs to intervene. That perhaps she is having some type of "dystocia." But why is that not a normal labor for her. If we are individuals- and we each have individuals growing inside of us- and our bodies are each unique...then why must this particular woman have a labor that can be "charted" and determined to be off the "normal" curve?

My oldest daughter takes a nap before she begins to push her babies out. Every labor has been this way- 3x. She rests before she begins the process of pushing her baby out. No one told her to do that. No one was afraid that her labor had "stalled".  We accept this as "Julie's way."

I had a mom recently "stall" at 6cm and she said she was tired and wanted to take a nap. I suggested that she listen to her body. She went on to have a cesarean birth, but only after several hours proved that this baby was not moving down and out of her body. But had it?

I think of that indigenous woman in the woods... does anyone know how long she has been 6cm? Does she become exhausted and rests before she births? Does anyone discuss the need for fluids? Pitocin? An epidural? Of a cesarean birth?

What is normal? It certainly would be an insult to me if someone labeled me such! But we are treated as if we need to be "fixed" if our labors are not such. But who decided what "normal" was? I think there are two questions one must ask before intervention is used... "Is my baby okay? Am I okay?" And the answer can not be "for now, but who knows in an hour," because they did not know an hour ago how you were going to be right now either.

We do need to look at the environment- the support- the preparation.Sure if she does not feel safe, supported or is full of fear it can cause her labor to "stall." But eventually she has to surrender. It may take days. She may be exhausted. She may need to become exhausted in order to surrender. That may be her "normal."

I am going to quit using words like "stalled" labor or "abnormal" labor. I am going to trust birth. I am going to trust womens' bodies.I am going to try to instill confidence and courage in women more each day.

I love being a bit off the grid- a unique woman. I love that my youngest daughter told me last month that I seem to be constantly reinventing myself. That is a compliment. Who wants to stay the same- stagnant? I want to not be normal. And I will support unique women with unique labors and only see them as their labors...

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Birthing Normally

I recently moved my office around and took out some bookcases. I rearranged my personal library by topic. One case has only birth books... one is special situations- breech, twins, etc... one is medical dictionary and baby books and the final one is breastfeeding books.

So today I was looking over the books that it has been a while since I read them. I pulled "birthing normally" by gayle peterson off the shelf. Thought I would just open it to a chapter and begin to read it... found exactly what I needed to share with you today!

page 38 in the second edition- Psychophysiological Integration

This big word means the "integration of mind and body." 

"Unhappy, dissatisfied mind states are reflected in body posture and movement. Our feelings can be read in our movements, as we physically relate to the world in context of our perception of ourselves in relation to others. the importance of getting familiar with our bodies and of making such information accessible to ourselves is reflected in the body experience of birthing. The more a woman can cooperate with her body to push her baby out, the smoother the journey through the vagina becomes. Being aware of tension, being able to relax and to let go of tension in a particular part of the body, becomes the process of yielding and working actively with the physical labor of  birth."

I often tell my clients that I do not "allow" them to perch. Of course I allow them to do whatever they want to do- but if they are wanting to let a baby go- out of their body- then by "perching" pressing their arms and hands stiffly into the chair or bed, holding their body tight and up and away from allowing their bodies and bottoms to relax, then it is obvious the two don't work together. Thus by encouraging a mom to not perch, I help her to let her body release and let go. Thus this cooperation with the body eases her body out much better and easier. I like the words Gayle uses here- yielding and actively working. I often use the word surrender to help a mom yield. And I like that a mom is actively participating in her labor. Thus she is not delivered, but is allowing her body to birth.

"As women become aware of their bodies, they can begin to recognize anxiety and fear as it is translated into body tension. In this manner, women can be educated to the mind-body link and the relationship of live style and mental state to physical health."

Gayle teaches that active participation in relaxation exercises help a woman to be actively able to relax when in labor. Often times couples will learn techniques but then do not practice them once home. Active relaxation works best when it is practiced. It is like Pavlov's dog - the bell means food- so the dog begins to salivate when he hears the bell. When one practices active relaxation, it allows the body to learn the correct response to this stimuli.

"Fear, and especially unrecognized life stress, can constrict the life breathing passageways, as well as the birth-giving passageways of the body. Visualizing the labor process with positive suggestion for ability to birth can be instrumental in inspiring a change of attitude in particular women."

Often times couples do not address the fears they have about labor, birth or even parenting. If this fear is not addressed, it not only does not go away but it can arise expectantly in labor and cause labor problems. She goes on to suggest that using guided imagery in recordings can change our perception of pain and prepare us for labor as well as our partner. Guided imagery taps into our mostly unused part of our brain that is hungry to be fed. The creative right brain can guide us in our labors in the way that our analytical left brain can not! A woman allowed to go to "laborland" with her endorphins as her vehicle can use the resources of her right brain- the guided images that are laying wait to help her.

"We have found mind-body integration to be a most powerful means of effecting change on the physical level."

"Adequate preparation should leave a couple calm and strong on the gateway to the unknown. They have seen and examined their inner reflection in this pregnancy- their fears, desires and expectations. They have strengthened their inner resources for dealing with stress and the unknown in life. Labor is an unknown. A woman does not know what her labor will be like. Classes doe not prepare her for what her labor will be for her. So she is entering the unknown and knows it. She is prepared only to meet the unknown in herself and is confident in her ability to look to herself for resources needed during her labor. This has been her preparation- that only she can give birth and that she must look to herself for strength, stamina, and active participation in birthing her baby. If she has learned this, she has learned much more."

I wonder if the classes most students take begin to prepare them for this unknown. If the classes do not challenge you to search within to find the strength our bodies have- then is this proper preparation? This kind of preparation of the unknown is not just labor and birth preparation but parenting preparation and marriage preparation and life preparation!

So look to your childbirth preparation not as a means to teach you how to time contractions or know the static stages of labor- which they are far from being- but instead teach you to become confident in your ability to handle the unknown and make good decisions that are right for you along that journey.