We recently had a student say that although her friends told her it was a waste of time and money to take a childbirth class, she felt she learned things that would be helpful for her preparation for labor and birth that she did not even know she needed to know before taking the classes. Her friends told her the classes they took- more than likely the wham bamm classes that hospitals feel compelled to teach since that is what folks say they want- were full of what the hospital required of them and the medication options they had. I laugh when I hear this and say, "Oh you took the how to be a good patient classes!"
I do think our classes are different. It is more about the mind body connection- the thing that most classes don't even cover. We cover the other basics- positions for labor and birth that enhance labor, the how to time contractions, the how to know when to go to the hospital, the how to ask questions in order to get answers... but we also cover things like: what fears do you have that may hold you up in labor? what roles do you expect your nurse, midwife, partner, doula to have? what is going to change the most as you become parents? what would need to happen to cause you to change your mind in labor about pain medication? what tools do you need in order to avoid interventions in labor? This is more than the yoga 3 hour session to learn how to "breathe and move" in labor- although we cover that. We do not show films on how an epidural is placed, if you need it you don't care how it is placed- only that it gets placed. We do show films on what real birth looks and sounds like. It is not the sanitized view you get from the half hour baby TV shows. We get you to expand your thinking about birth- about your ability- about your body... and we have fun doing it!
You leave our classes feeling not only prepared for labor and birth but perhaps also as new parents. We discuss how to make the transition easier as a couple to a triad or more. We help you in self discovery rather than just feeding you information. It causes you to have to work through things in the process- having lots of conversations with your partner. We really do believe this is a journey. And we believe that it is not about a specific outcome but instead about learning what works for you- what is right in your specific situation- and what is the next best thing as events occur that change your initial goals.
We do not teach a slam bamm class due to the amount of information we feel needs to be shared. We teach a six week series and we do teach a two weekend immersion but even that class started out as a long weekend and we just did not feel great about the absorption of the information- there needed to be a bit more time. This is an investment. Labor is a day in your life but the birth will effect you for the rest of your life. Trust me, childbirth classes are not created equal.
I would love to hear your comments- what were your classes like? If you did not take classes, why not and how did that work for you?
7 comments:
Resa Bishop Mechling at 9:34am April 3
I can't compare since I only took your class, not the hospital classes. I knew I wanted something different all along and that's how I found you in the first place. Not only did I learn a lot from the classes you taught but Ron did. He's remarked many times over the years about things he learned from you in those classes that really did prepare him... Read More for what would/did happen. And regarding your mentioning real labor videos. So true! I remember being a little take aback at some of the labors originally but through my own subsequent births those images remained with me and helped be become even more confident to labor my way each time.
I have a friend at work who chose not to take any type of class. Her husband told her it was pointless and cost too much (they were first time parents). She went along with it, didn't prepare at all...I don't think she even read any books about birth. When the day came she was completely confused, scared, alone, and in pain. She had no support system and just went along with what the doctor said. Ended up with an epidural and excessive bleeding afterwards. She still talks about that day being horrible. I really don't understand how people can think a class "costs too much." To me it's priceless. Especially your classes which are definitely NOT created equal from what I've read/heard about other classes. I feel so lucky to have found you!
Well, here is my comment Teresa. :) Years ago I tuaght in a hospital setting - but I tuaght MY way. I was always on the edge -waiting to be let go because I was a bit "controversial" in my approach. Which was to ask women and their labor partners what THEY wanted from a class and not follow the script. One hospital had anesthesia come in and give a "presentation". More a lecture on - are you CRAZY - of course you need our $1800 epidural. When I protested and stated this was a conflict of interest I was told if I didn't like it I could leave - which I promptly did. And at that time we really could use that money. But I couldn't prostitute myself like that. Harsh, I know, but that was how I felt at the time. The next hospital was a bit better in that they had midwives on-board and had for years. But the docs would get mad if a midwifery client said her midwife didn't do episiotomies - I would get the blame for talking about that in class. HUH? Then, they came to us - about 10 instructors - and said they were revising the classes and would we work on developing a new agenda. We were so excited. We worked very hard and used many of my techniques as a doula for the classes - with stations that women could use to try out different laboring positions. But that wasn't what they had in mind. They wanted to drop down to 4 classes from 6 and have it be all lecture. At the end when relaxation was taught the couples had the opportunity to leave if they were planning an epidural. We were amazed - like women having an epidural didn't need relaxation techniques that could follow you all through life? Jerry had just had his by-pass and was out of work. I sat at the table with my fellow instructors and our supervisor with tears streaming down my face and asked for a sheet of paper. I wrote my resignation and walked out the door. I am not saying we should shove this down people's throats but how often does a first time mother not even really know what she wants until she attends class? And then gets such a sense of empowerment when she and her partner realize they are NOT helpless and can actually DO something to help her in labor. And that they have options - even an epidural if they want. That was the difference between me and the hospital - I offered ALL the options - they did not. Not saying they are all the same but around here it is a cookie cutter class and it is to teach how to be a good patient. Very sad. Keep up the good work Teresa!!
Crystal
Crystal I think there are a ton of hospital staff educators who bang their heads against the wall- wanting to teach something different. But as you said sometimes it is the hospital but often times it is the couples themselves who make the curriculum the how to have a baby our way... many educators at the hospitals tell me the top two questions are, "how soon can I get my epidural?" and "how many centimeters do I have to be to get my epidural?" Women are choosing to "check out" and just get the labor over with as fast as possible- so the classes have changed to meet the demand.
I know I get calls from folks not understanding why we can teach an all day eight hour class to get them prepared... We won't do it. There is too much self discovery, information and the absorption rate of information is too fast... so sometimes it is the hospital or doctors' offices but often times it is the patients themselves.
I don't really have the words for how necessary and helpful your class is. Everything I try to say about it, doesn't really seem to do it justice. I have tried to share this with friends and sadly, people don't realize what it can do for them. I guess my successful un-medicated vaginal birth isn't proof enough. There is a ton of fear out there and that is a powerful thing. I know you are doing you best to counter that!
My first class was a typical hospital class - how to be a good patient. It touted the wonders of the epidural while scaring you to death about the process.
The second class I took was also at the hospital but through a different group (wish I could remember the name). This was the first time I heard about asking "what is the medical necessity for that?". That phrase opened up a whole new world of options. After that class I found Labor of Love. While I never took one of your classes just our conversations about the journey through pregnancy and birth made us feel so much more empowered. I LOVE LOVE LOVE your article on using your BRAIN and I reference that often. The amazing things you teach - I am sure in the classroom but also one-on-one - were truly a gift.
Absolutely Teresa, just like in our doula work. We hear those comments all the time. Years ago -and I do mean YEARS - a woman in my class asked if she could just have a cesarean. She was terrified to labor. I tried the best I could - reminding her that this is what women have done since the beginning of time - nothing worked. I thought - well, forget it because you can't request a cesarean for that reason. Now we have women doing it all the time for fear as well as convenience. Our daughter gave birth last year by cesarean after 38 hours of labor and trying everything to get that baby out. They want to start trying again this summer and already the comments she is getting because she wants to labor again. Everything to - you are NUTS - to trying to scare her to death. What makes their was - of sceduling a repeat any safer than her way? What gives women the right to try and scare other women? We had the same problem at the hosptial - demand - and the hospital caved and gave into it. Being around a long time I have seen the pendulum swing several times. I don't know when it will come back - I keep hoping but don't see any movement. It scares me because I have daughters who are not finished having babies and I have four granddaughters. Best I can do is to keep educating them about how it can be. Take care,
Crystal
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