Daniel's letter

Dear Labor of Love,

I wanted to take a moment and write to you regarding what I believe has been the most amazing experience of my life, the birth of my daughter Zoe. This experience was made all the more special because of an amazing woman who helped my wife and I through it. Guina Bixler is that special woman. To be completely honest, I knew nothing of doulas or birthing guides before meeting Guina, but that all changed during our first meeting.

During the months leading up to the birth of our daughter, Guina was always there for my wife. Guina would help with birthing exercises or just listening to my wife’s fears in a way that only another woman could. Zoe was breech, so that added some stress to the situation. My wife was afraid that she was going to be unable to have a true birthing experience, but again Guina was there with words of support and comfort. So with our doctor’s advice, my wife and I scheduled the Cesarean for July 29th.

In the end, little Zoe had other plans. On July 24th my wife went into labor, our first call was to Guina. She was amazing, she gave us suggestions of how to determine if these contractions were the real thing or just false labor and she also helped calm my wife and me down (Something I was having a difficult time doing).

As helpful as Guina was during the lead up, it was at the hospital where she truly shined. Her presence had a great calming effect on my wife, and it allowed me to handle the “business” end of things knowing full well that my wife’s wishes and concerns were being cared for. Without Guina, I do not think I would have been strong enough to stand up to the nurses in Labor and Delivery who only wanted to drug my wife and have her lie still on the bed. For that alone I will always be grateful for her presence.

Leading up to the C-Section, Guina supported my wife, but always made a point to check and see how I was holding up. When my wife was wheeled into the O.R., Guina spent a great deal of time explaining to me what was going to happen when we were in the room (something the doctors failed to do). During the surgery, Guina’s presence allowed me to focus on my wife, and not worry about “capturing” the moment on film. I was able to be a husband, and not a photographer or cheerleader. After the surgery, I had to leave my wife to go with Zoe; Guina again stepped in and filled a greatly needed role. She supported and comforted my wife while I was with Zoe in the transitional nursery. Because of Guina, I was able to focus all my attention on my new daughter, knowing full well that my wife was in the wonderful and caring hands of Guina. Guina always seemed to know exactly the right moment to step in and help, and when to seem completely invisible. As a husband, my experience with Guina has made me a strong supporter of doulas. I find myself time and again telling every man I know that if their wife wants a doula, that they should do it. The will never regret having a woman like Guina in their corner during this time.

Please feel free to post this message on your website, as it would be an honor for me to help more men feel comfortable with their decision to have a doula.

Sincerely,

Daniel A. Gagnon

Father to Zoe Rhiannon Gagnon

Husband to Kara Gagnon

And friend to Guina Bixler